approaching things differently: recap on disconnecting

As most of you know, one of my goals the past couple weeks has been to make efforts to disconnect from technology. The goal of this is to become a little bit more connected to what I am doing, and to be more mindful of my approach to time.

Okay guys, if we’re being honest here… this was, and is, REALLY hard. Not only was it hard to take some space from my phone and wait to reply to a text message until I was done whatever task at hand (like cooking dinner, watching an episode of TV or reading an article), but it was hard in terms of other people. By this I mean the expectation that you will return their text message close to immediately. Because let’s get real here… most people are so attached to their iPhones and they often reply within minutes—and if they don’t? It means that they are ignoring us or something terrible has happened. What is the proper etiquette to get back to somebody via text?

During this experiment, I found I wasn’t able to disconnect completely. I still had my phone in my back pocket a lot of the time, and when it would vibrate, I would check it. Depending on the content of the message, I would decide whether or not to reply right away. Anything that was more ‘time-sensitive’, like making plans, stuff that had to do with work, I would reply. If it was more conversational, I would try and wait until I had a free moment to reply.

This wasn’t always perfect though. I still spent a lot of time having text conversations with Sam, or consciously awaiting a response from someone else when it wasn’t urgent or immediate. I also found that even though I wasn’t checking my phone as much, if I had put it away, I was still curious to see if I had missed anything. As for overall disconnecting, I had some nice quiet moments without technology where I was able to listen to music and spend some time sitting on the couch with my pets. This is something that happens relatively frequently, and I would really love some more time where I am JUST reading, or JUST doing schoolwork; rather than doing those things with my iPhone sitting next to me. It’s a process, clearly!!

The biggest thing I learned through this little experiment was how much we are reliant on our phones. For telling time (although I wear a watch most days), for overall communication and keeping in touch, calendars, etc. It’s not just about texting or calling anymore. Our phones serve as something to keep our hands busy or to save us from feeling uncomfortable. How many times have you checked your phone in order to appear distracted rather than feel awkward? I am certainly guilty of it. The best part of this process was trying to avoid this, and noticing other people and their cellphone use. The other best part was having the “disconnection” conversation with friends in real-life. Talking about the downfalls of Facebook and instant communication. We still might engage in it, but I think an awareness of how we spend our time is crucial in order to not let it take over our lives.

In conclusion, I wasn’t really effective in turning my phone off or to have time each day without any technology at all. I think some of that is just unrealistic. It is so embedded in our days! I was, however, able to understand and see where I was purposefully distracting myself and made an effort to stop that. I also found I was a lot more okay with not having my phone on me (the times where I either left it at home or in my bag). It felt a lot more okay when I was spending time with really good company—I felt like I didn’t need to be connected at all. I am going to continue to try and be mindful of my time spent with technology.

For my next “approaching things differently” goal, I want to try and approach my routine differently. My goal is for some consistency. Consistency in bed time routines (like going to bed at the same time each day!) and trying to have some more time to myself in the mornings for breakfast and what not. I am the biggest night owl, and I have struggled with mornings for most of my life. My next goal is all about embracing the mornings! I know that is a strange one, but it’s definitely something I struggle with and would love to feel better about it in general. I’ll check back with you all again in a few weeks to let you know how that is going…. as well, I am going to continue with my goal of disconnecting. This is baby steps for me!

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