currently thankful for

Happy Canadian Thanksgiving!! Thanksgiving is typically a holiday revolving around food—as most are—yet we find that sometimes the "real meaning" of the holiday is sometimes lost. Because of this, we decided to take our post this week to reflect on what we are thankful for.

Growing up Thanksgiving typically just meant going to my grandma's house and having dinner with my family; something that was pretty common on the weekends during that time. Just another dinner and day. The only difference being that my parents had work off so we all got to spend time together on a weekday. About 8 years ago I gave up eating meat, which made Thanksgiving and most other family meals a little more difficult. I was never a huge fan of turkey or the "traditional" Thanksgiving foods in the first place, so I never really felt like I was missing out on anything. This has changed! 4 years ago I moved into my own apartment, and the nature of the holiday shifted for me. Each year my roommates and I have hosted a variety of Thanksgiving meals. Our first Thanksgiving, we had 17 people in my unfurnished apartment, used all my cutlery and ate off paper plates. We made a turkey, 2 tofurky's, 3 pies, and our guests brought a giant table of food. The following year, we had less people, but more food. Same with the next. Because of this, I have developed a love for Thanksgiving and it includes—time with friends, and lots and lots and lots of food that I can eat!

However, this year is a bit different, since our Fall Reading Break falls with Thanksgiving, most people have gone home to visit their families, as well some have moved away since graduating. So what am I doing? I spent Saturday with my former roommate on a day trip down to Syracuse, NY to do some shopping, and will be enjoying a "homeless" Thanksgiving with a friend that is in town. It is definitely not the same as the other years, but I am excited for it nevertheless.

So what am I thankful for this week? That all these years I have always been able to spend this holiday with those that I care about. That I have always been supported in everything I've ever wanted to pursue (as crazy an idea it may have been) and that I have such fantastic people in my life. I am grateful for the personal connections I make each and every day—whether it is with people I chat with on a day to day basis through work, volunteering and school; or through my close friendships. I feel grateful and thankful that I am given these opportunities, and the fact that I get to share different aspects of my life with so many people. And as usual, I am especially grateful for the company of my family, best friends (and roommate), and our three pets, who get to deal with the day to day crazy that is my life.

-g

“I actually attack the concept of happiness. The idea that - I don’t mind people being happy - but the idea that everything we do is part of the pursuit of happiness seems to me a really dangerous idea and has led to a contemporary disease in Western society, which is fear of sadness. It’s a really odd thing that we’re now seeing people saying “write down 3 things that made you happy today before you go to sleep”, and “cheer up” and “happiness is our birthright” and so on. We’re kind of teaching our kids that happiness is the default position - it’s rubbish. Wholeness is what we ought to be striving for and part of that is sadness, disappointment, frustration, failure; all of those things which make us who we are. Happiness and victory and fulfillment are nice little things that also happen to us, but they don’t teach us much. Everyone says we grow through pain and then as soon as they experience pain they say “Quick! Move on! Cheer up!” I’d like just for a year to have a moratorium on the word “happiness” and to replace it with the word “wholeness”. Ask yourself “is this contributing to my wholeness?” and if you’re having a bad day, it is.”

- Hugh Mackay

It used to be a big fuss to get my brother and I to family gatherings, but the one meal that I did enjoy partaking in was Thanksgiving. Every year, it was held at my grandparent’s house. My mother’s whole side of the family would be there, and in recent years came the addition of a new uncle and cousins (two littles and two new pups). We would gather in the living room over a table of appetizers: the usual deviled eggs, quiche, and an experimental dish from my aunt and uncle (they are the “cooks” of the family… As a kid I found their dishes too “out there,” but now I look forward to them). My grandmother would be in the kitchen busying herself with the feast, with the occasional helping hand making their way into the kitchen to chip in. Eventually, my brother and I would go up too, and would fight over who got to ring the bell to sound for dinner. In the feast, you were sure to find a hodgepodge of potato dishes, an exquisite salad from my aunt and uncle and my grandmothers signature jelly salad. When we were a smaller group, we would eat around the dining room table. It was a small room, no doubt, but we cozied up around the table. More recently, we’ve dined in more of a potluck style. Mosey up to the kitchen to collect your food and wine, and progress down into the living room to eat off the coffee or card tables. It doesn’t matter where we eat though, because the conversation always starts flowing and laughter ensues. Once we are stuffed to the brim with seconds and thirds, my grandmother and dad have argued over the turkey heart, and the dried wishbones have been cracked, dessert is broken out. Pumpkin pie, always, with the second option changing by the year. It’s after this that we collect ourselves in the front entrance and say our long-drawn goodbyes. The next time we’ll be together like this isn’t until Christmas.

This year is different, though. The whole year has been in fact. Long-standing traditions like these have almost entirely ceased to exist. From what I recall, we have hardly gotten together at all. My grandmother passed away earlier this year, and it’s not hard to see how much she really held us all together. It makes me so sad for my young cousins who will not know of these traditions that are so vivid in my mind.

I am thankful for my health, and the health of those around me. It’s been a really tough year with far too many friends and family ending up with a variety of ailments. It’s so unfortunate, and it’s all too common these days, it seems. I’m thankful to have such wonderful people in my life, perhaps not living within the same city, but just an e-mail away. I’m thankful to have this life of plenty, to be so fortunate to live here, in this city. I'm thankful to have known a woman so strong, so caring as my grandmother, and I will forever remember her on days like today. No, Thanksgivings and other holidays are not going to be the same as they used to be, but is that so bad? If anything, our loss should strengthen our bonds and bring us closer together. My cousins will not know what I knew, but they will know a whole other kind of love. Perhaps not this year, but next, will bring new traditions to life.

- s

What are you feeling thankful for this holiday weekend?